DIY a Stay at Home Dad can do-Cutting down a Tree

Before reading any farther, ask yourself these questions.    Is the tree in the middle of the forest?  Am I a lumberjack?  If the answer to either of those questions was “No”, then you should not cut this tree down.

The particular tree in question for this dad was a dead 60 foot tall pine that was standing in the way of progress.  Specifically, this tree was where Baby Mojo’s play set was going to be installed, in the back corner of the yard.  If I were an advanced home repair guy and not some guy sitting in his underwear watching Star Wars, I’d build and design my own play set.  However, the ice planet Toth is fraught with danger and designing a play set was forbidden by Princess Jenny.

I insisted that I could cut the tree down.  Thankfully, in a moment of pine induced lucidity, I asked my neighbor his opinion.  “Well, my dad used to cut down trees for the power company, I can tell that……” he said, as I was suddenly wishing his father was here and not him.

We had a local company come out and the price was more affordable than I thought it would be $200.  While I’m not exactly dropping that kind of money out of my diaper bag, I knew that any fence repair would be more than that.

When the arborists got to the house they had to throw a rope into the top of the tree, secure that and then wrap the rope around a bigger tree that was still living, laughing at its’ dead brethren about to be cut down.  Then they cut the base of the tree and lowered the dangling pine five feet at a time to where they could cut it and take it off property.

So dads, unless you have 300 feet of 2 inch thick rope and a couple buddies to help you wrangle the job, don’t do it.  Of course, if you’re a lumberjack go forth and prosper, then move next to me so you can help cut down these other trees.

As a stay at home dad I miss having the spare time to fix things.  Even though the child is my full time job, things still break or need a fix in the house.  Sometimes the repair will be something that I easily complete and other times it’s a repair that I simply should’ve paid to have it done.  Regardless, I’ll write it up here in hopes that you may be able to gauge what you can do and when you need to call in for help.  The series is called, DIY a Stay at Home Dad Can Do, but in some cases, you shouldn’t, because of difficulty, time involved or money.  All dads aren’t equal.   If you’re a lumberjack or have a James Bond style jet pack , then bypass this series and go straight to the fart jokes, which should be in the next column.