The final lap of the mystery reader tour

Thinking about the last or final time something happens can be nostalgic, scary or trigger feelings of remorse.  When your children get older you make mental notes about their last this or their final that and most of them don’t matter, but some of them do.

 

That baby shampoo commercial, the one with the voiceover going over the last time that you gave your baby a bath in the sink.  I saw it when our first child was just born and was of the mindset that “yeah, that’ll never be me”.   However, there I was taking photos of his next to last bath, the last time that our youngest had to drink a bottle before bed and other seemingly random photos.

Mind you, I don’t regret taking those photos.  They’re awesome and are great moments in time of a baby that kept on growing.  But, will those instances really stand up over time?  In 20 years will I look at those photos and think that’s the last time that they did this or had to do that?  I don’t know.

One memory that will stand up is story time.  Story time at PRE-K is amazing.  In our PRE-K each family gets to be the mystery reader twice a year.  The mystery reader will stand in the hallway while the teacher gives the kids clues as to who will be reading.  Come to find out that all of the parents in our son’s class also like hiking, going to the nature center, eating pizza and drive a blue car.  Thanks to the lack of a speech sentinel we also learned that one of the students had diarrhea last week and one threw up this week.  More on that in a moment.

You’re a rock star when you are the mystery reader to a group of PRE-K kids.  Your child beams when they see you, give you a hug and get to sit at the front of the class while you try to read to them.  It is exactly like that scene from Kindergarten Cop where Arnold tells the kid that it’s not a tumor.

Mystery readers want to interact with the kids.  Stop the story at certain points and ask everyone, “OK, who has a dog like the one in the story” or something innocent like that.  Asking a question to a group of PRE-K kids is like taking your finger out of the dam that’s plugging the leak.

My brother got sick.  He always picks his nose.  Eeeww, boys are dirty.  I sneeze into my elbow all the time.  It was here when the 5 year old girl volunteered that she had diarrhea once.  Instead of asking how she felt now I assumed that she was feeling better.  Think like a lawyer when talking to a group of small children and don’t ask questions that can’t be answered with a yes or no response.

Our wife was mystery reader the last time it was offered.  I immediately offered for her to take it because she wanted it and I spend more time with the kids during the week. She came back glowing, like she had just been treated like a rock star.

When I finished my mystery reader tour I had that same glow.  I was also slightly melancholy because in the back of my mind I knew that this was most likely the last time I did that.  Do they have mystery readers in kindergarten?

No matter, the teachers took a photo or two; I saw them with their camera.  I asked them to send me a copy, just for the records.  I’ll put it in the same mental category as the last baby bottle and sink bath.